What Wakes me at Night

My father sheds tears while he speaks.

My brothers don’t seem to care.

Maybe they do, they just have their own worlds to tend.

I struggle on my own. No wonder people choose security over dreams.

I’m failing in most things.

I never finish what I start.

I worry too much just like my mother.

They don’t have that long . . . do they know it?

I’m afraid I won’t have time to save them.

It wasn’t my fault. Although many things are.

Pete Davidson’s post… relatable. I should have said “If you go, I go.”

My heart’s in a little black box.

What did that lady say? Put your hands over your heart. It’s adult you quieting child you and letting her know everything is okay and you are safe now.

You’re crying – see, you can still feel.

I’m crazy to be doing what I’m doing –

I’m either bold to expose myself or stupid to think it makes a difference.

I’m looking to my heart for answers but sometimes it does not speak.

What happened to my meditation practice? I lost my inner voice.

I’ll start over today.

M.

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